Writer's Block
Live and learn

By John Christian Hopkins
Diné Bureau

Some things in this world are easy to understand.

For example, when driving down the road, if you see a sign saying "slow children," then you know somebody in the neighborhood has stupid kids.

But some things get so confusing, it's hard to figure them out.

Like, I eat apples and still have to go to the doctor. And, if I'm still not sure what's good for the goose, then how do I know what's good for the gander?

The hardest things to understand are directions.

I just bought a new hydraulic jack and it took me three hours to figure out how to use it and get my tire changed. The instructions said to read them thoroughly before attempting to use the jack. I kept reading and rereading, but just got more and more confused.

Finally, I just stuffed the directions in my pocket and decided a hydraulic jack works pretty much like any other jack.

Now, I hate asking for directions when driving. But, at least back in Rhode Island, if you get directions, it'll be "Go three blocks on Elm Street, take a left onto Maple and go four blocks until you reach the intersection of Maple and Oak."

Although you are looking for elm, maple and oak, you are looking for street signs not the actual trees.

It's different out here.

Sara, her mom, Bernice, and I were on our way to attend a traditional Navajo wedding basket ceremony in Coppermine. I'm not sure if Coppermine is in the middle of nowhere, but it's certainly in the neighborhood!

The directions told us to go toward The Gap. Okay, I knew what that was. But then they got confusing!

We had to look for where the old gas station was. Hey, I'm new out here, how am I supposed to know where the former gas station was? Much less to turn left when I reached the former gas station.

Oh, the directions said to take the dirt road that was still being worked on. Doesn't that describe almost every road on the reservation? When I first moved out here, I thought every road on the reservation was named "Road Work Ahead."

Well, I don't know if the road we were on was really being worked on, but if it was, it wasn't much help. The road had more humps that a herd of camels; and more dips that a dozen Baskin Robbins ice cream parlors!

Now this dirt road looked like it stretched all the way around the globe, just miles and miles of bumps and ruts. But we didn't have to follow it all the way to the end only until we saw the first windmill.

At the windmill, we turned left. Now, at this point I was excited.

I thought the directions said that after turning left at the windmill, we just had to follow the baboons tied on the side of the road. I was looking forward to seeing the baboons.

But, it turns out the road was so bumpy that it must have jarred my eyesight when I was reading the directions; and instead of baboons, we only found balloons tied up.

Still, it was a nice wedding and I did learn something: There's a place harder to reach than Pueblo Pintado.

John Christian Hopkins can be reached at hopkins1960@hotmail.com or by calling 505-371-5443.