Care of shunned vet overwhelms family
Health, behavioral problems steepen uphill fight

By Natasha Kaye Johnson
Diné Bureau

TOHLAKAI — As the day begins to cool down, Robert Talley, 69, sits at his kitchen table and sips on a can of cold Coca-Cola.

The sound of radio station KGAK is vague in the background, with old country tunes playing with commercials and announcements in Navajo between songs.

"I like this station," he said Friday, smiling. "They play oldies, but they're goodies."

He takes another sip of his soda, but the carbonation irritates his colostomy bag. He takes a moment to examine it and decides that drinking the soda hurts his stomach too much. A few moments later, he covers the soda with a purple ashtray to keep the flies out.

With a bit of hesitation, he begins to recount memories from his adulthood to his childhood. His recollections include planting corn as a young boy with his father; details of the first time he tried rubbing alcohol; and memories of his comrades in Istanbul, Turkey, during his time in the Vietnam War. The details he shares are vivid and often raw, and he asked that those details not be put in the newspaper.

In an instant, the conversation switches back to what he did that day. He points to the groceries still in their plastic bags, and the shampoo he bought. He runs his hands through his hair, saying that it has been three days since he washed it, but that he warmed up some water in his Mr. Coffee as soon as he got the shampoo.

"That is a businessman coffee pot," he jokes of his coffee maker. "The water doesn't get that hot. I want a steel one."

Two weeks earlier
The days pass slowly for Robert, and just as slow for his family, who worry about his health and well-being.

"Some days he feels good, some days he doesn't want to be Robert," Manuel Tsosie, 29, an in-law to Robert, said. Robert is the uncle to his wife, Freida Pete.

For over a month, Tsosie has been working nonstop to get his uncle into a specialized care facility. He took a temporary leave of absence from his construction job in Albuquerque to help his uncle. Just two weeks ago, Tsosie, Freida, Robert's sister Molly Pete, and her husband, Benson Pete, sat down and shared the frustration they have been experiencing in trying to get Robert nursing care and specialized services through Veterans Affairs and other veteran organizations.

"I've been trying to dig up all these resources here," Tsosie said, holding a piece of tattered papers covered with names and phone numbers. "Everybody is shutting the door on him."

The family explained the details of Robert's health problems over the years, starting from the early winter months of 2006. Robert's left leg had to be amputated below the knee after a night of drinking. He passed out in the cold weather and suffered frostbite. The frostbite eventually led to gangrene, and his left leg and the toes on his right leg then had to removed.

A few months later, Robert was placed into Red Rock Care, but behavioral problems led to him being kicked out within months. The family was able to get him into Bonney Family Home, and while minor behavioral problems remained, the family worked with the home, and he was able to stay.

After a few months passed, Robert's family learned that his sons had checked him out of the nursing facility and taken him on a weeklong drinking binge. When the binge was over, the family said that the sons dropped Robert off at the entrance of Indian Health Service and drove off.

He shuffled between the two care centers until his family was able to get him back into Bonney's, where he stayed almost another year before a continuous pain he suffered was diagnosed as colon cancer in February. He had been diagnosed with the cancer over ten years ago, but the family was informed that it had come back and was severe.

Robert was put on chemotherapy, and his colon was removed the next month.

"When his foot froze, everything started to go down on him," said Tsosie. "His leg is gone, his health is gone. We got a domino effect going on here."

After his surgery, Robert was admitted back into a local nursing home, but was kicked out again for his behavior.

The family again tried to get him into a nursing home, but his previous behavior problems prevented him from being accepted. At one point, the family said they were told by Red Rock Care to take him to Gallup's local detox center, Na'nizhoozhi Center.

"They told me to take him to NCI," Freida Pete, who is 23-years old. "I was like, 'For what?'"

Freida said he wasn't drinking, and when she went to NCI, they were perplexed as to why they were suggested as a place for him.

Problems stemming from alcohol
Robert's behavior problems, his family is certain, stem from his addiction to alcohol. For years, the family has said Robert struggled with alcoholism, which took over his life after he came back from the service.

They felt that they could easily get specialized services and counseling for him, being a veteran. Instead, Tsosie said their efforts only led to closed doors, with each organization from federal, state, and tribal entities putting the responsibility on someone else.

"I thought it was going to be easy (to get services) because he's a vet," Tsosie. "This book is full of names and numbers. I'm just trying my best, but it seems like I'm running around in circles."

Last month, the family put their money together to drive to the VA hospital in Albuquerque, only to be told that the earliest any beds would open up would be in six to nine months. Because he wasn't severely disabled, Molly said hospital officials suggested that they take him to a Salvation Army homeless shelter.

The suggestion only left her disappointed, and left a bad taste in Tsosie's mouth.

A veteran of the Army himself, Tsosie is convinced that his uncle was never properly assessed for psychological problems like Post Traumatic Stress Disorder when he was discharged. Frequent conversations his uncle shares about the war only further convince Tsosie that Robert needs help.

"Back then it was just a revolving door," Tsosie said. "They didn't know it was going to affect their lives in the long run."

Daily care is difficult
Because he is not being professionally taken care of, the family fears that Robert will get sick from an infection. Although the family attempts to take care of him, they said they don't really know how to deliver proper care.

"The hardest part is his diet," Tsosie said.

Each day, Molly walks to her brother's home down the road to bring him three square meals a day. But they often learn that he wasn't able to eat some of the foods she brought.

"I don't really eat all of this," Robert said about his food. "All of a sudden it pops."

The poor conditions of the home also worry the family. The home is 65 years old and was the where Molly and her siblings were raised.

"This is not a place for handicap," Molly Pete, who is 74-years old, said. "It's about to fall apart."

Ever since they were children, Molly said she has been close to her brother and has watched over him. She recalled times when they were young, and how he would help their father with the sheep and the horses. But things changed after he came back from the war, she said.

"He was already drinking when he came back from the service," Molly said.

Molly said his drinking became worse, and his family kicked him out.

"Then he came back here. Pretty soon he became what you call an alcoholic," said Molly. "He kept losing his money for liquor."

Robert openly shared the first time he ever drank. It was when his brother Pete was discharged from the Korean War, and returned back home from his service base in El Paso.

"I was 16," said Robert, in-between conversation with his family. "I didn't like it."

It would be only a few months later when Robert would enlist in the service himself. He became part of the 101st Airborne Division and was stationed at Ft. Campbell in Kentucky. He recalled times spent at a soldiers' club near the ocean and an officers' club, when beer was 10 cents a can, and how they were given free alcohol and cigarettes while in the service.

Four years later, Robert was discharged and he returned home to Tohlakai, and began working for the railroad.

Over the years, the family said Robert struggled with alcohol and would go on drinking binges, disappearing for long periods of time. Three years ago, they said, he was gone for over a month, which was unusually long.

They started calling the police, detox centers, and homeless shelters, but were unable to locate him. Desperate to find him, the family made flyers and posted them in Gallup and Albuquerque. Then one day, their niece noticed him on the streets while she was riding the Albuquerque city bus.

"We missed him," Molly Pete said. "I was worried about him."

After they found him, Molly said they had to convince him to come back.

"He kind of didn't want to come back, but I told him his home is over here," she said. "He said, 'I've been thinking about it (home).'"

Though Molly tries to help her brother, traditional teachings she was raised with limit what she can do.

"In the traditional way, you can't touch your brother's body," Benson Pete said.

Staying at home
The family not only worries about his physical well being, but his emotional well being also.

"I think he's getting lonely," Molly said.

When asked what he does to pass the time by himself, Robert said he reads books.

"I read the encyclopedia," he said.

He said he also reads books on mechanics and electrical wiring that he got from the Navajo Book Project several years ago.

Robert shared his own frustrations of not being able to get into a home, and often times his family said he jokes about the whole situation. "He said, 'I might just slip to get back in (the hospital),'" Tsosie said.

His joking scares the family, and often times they don't know what to think about it.

"I just want him to get a place where he can stay and they can help him with changing," Molly said.

"We care for him," Benson said. "We try to help him every way we can."

With a history of alcoholism, Tsosie feels that his uncle has been pushed to the side as being hopeless, and it's emotional for him to see that treatment first hand.

"He could have done a lot of things with his life, but he went to the service," said Tsosie. "The fact that nobody has accepted him, it's a real killer. It's just sad the way he's being treated."

This past Wednesday, on Independence Day, Robert turned 69 years-old. But his family fears that he might not see another birthday.

Saturday evening, Molly walked over to him bring dinner as she usually does, and found him hunched over the floor of his kitchen."I was trying to pick him up, but he was too heavy," said Freida. Tsosie said he had drunk rubbing alcohol, and an ambulance came to take him to Indian Health Service.

"He's a danger to himself. We're all afraid he's going to do something else," Tsosie said. "Nobody is taking us seriously."

Although the memories of her uncle's addiction often over-shadow good memories, Freida keeps the happier times with him close to her heart.

"He used to really play the guitar," Freida said, remembering how her uncle would trade items at the pawn shop to accumulate a collection of guitars.

"I remember I was 9 or 10, he was playing the guitar and he put me on his lap. That's the first time I remember playing the guitar with him."